September 2011
1 post
I’m still alive. Believe it or not, I’m still fucking alive.
Everything about me that used to exist is dead. I have killed my past, cut it into pieces, and sealed it inside a wall in the basement.
That is to say, I’ve grown up. I have moved along in life. I left the city. I left the loud music. And I left all of the narcotics behind.
I am still trying to get a grip on this...
March 2011
1 post
HEY, REMEMBER ALL OF THE DRUGS YOU USED TO DO?
HEY, REMEMBER ALL OF THE FRIENDS YOU USED TO TREAT LIKE SHIT?
HEY, REMEMBER HOW MUCH YOU FUCKED UP YOUR FAMILY LIFE?
HEY, REMEMBER HOW MISERABLE EACH AND EVERY DAY WAS UNLESS YOU WAS WASTED?
HEY, REMEMBER WHEN YOU LET GUYS TREAT YOU LIKE SHIT?
HEY, REMEMBER ALL OF THE PLACES YOU’VE BEEN? AND THE PEOPLE YOU KNEW? AND ALL OF THE THINGS YOU...
November 2010
2 posts
It feels so good to be where I’m at right now. Last year, I was lost. Lost in Allston looking desperately for something, some sense of the grand community, and always adventure. Before that, I was lost in Medford, doing drugs and wasting away in a smaller community of friends. I spent two years hardly working, hardly trying, hardly caring. Everything had become about the next party, the next...
I ran away from the internet with a broken heart. It’s still broken, but I’ve been working on the best new start.
Life is coming together for the first time in a long time. I am happy, for the most part. I still comtemplate everything between us daily, but I’ve given myself enough “me time” to get my shit back in order. Work has been wonderful, new looks are...
July 2010
1 post
I am haunted by pain. It will not leave me. And I just can’t breathe.
May 2010
1 post
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-5-2) →
Whitney Houston (1)
Robbie Williams (1)
Phil Collins (1)
Simon & Garfunkel (1)
Violent Femmes (1)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
April 2010
3 posts
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-4-25) →
She & Him (3)
The Format (2)
The Pigeon Detectives (1)
Beck (1)
Ingrid Michaelson (1)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-4-18) →
Boys Like Girls (1)
Peaches (1)
Tom Waits (1)
The Magnetic Fields (1)
The Sea and Cake (1)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Faith and hope are bullshit regarding religion- it’s about time you remember that it goes the same with people.
Stop hoping for things. Stop putting faith in him. In everyone. In anyone.
March 2010
4 posts
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-3-28) →
Violent Femmes (2)
Minus the Bear (2)
Editors (1)
Junction 18 (1)
Inara George (1)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Living on a couch sucks.
MAJOR cock block last night.
Thanks, Becca.
I woke up today with a knot in my stomach thinking about you. It’s not even over, but it hurts more than you can imagine.
Happy one day, miserable the next howevermany.
I hate being sad like this.
February 2010
8 posts
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-2-21) →
Queen (34)
Pixies (31)
PJ Harvey (15)
The Postal Service (15)
Plain White T’s (14)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
FUCKING OUCH.
He broke it and shit. Or just threw it out. Lost it. Forgot. Didn’t care. It’s gone now. It hurts, but the pain just feels empty and it’s hard to swallow. Stupid girl, stupid girl. I was just so happy before. Square one. Gonna be okay. Gotta be okay. Gonna take some time.
Smile bright now girl.
Predictions for 2k10
My heart will experience more pain than it ever, previously, could have imagined.
“The lights were very active that night. There were some other people watching...”
I just wish things were playing out the way I originally thought they were going to.
I hate not knowing what is going on.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-1-31) →
At the Drive-In (20)
Modest Mouse (16)
Pixies (13)
Belle & Sebastian (7)
The Hold Steady (7)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Whiskey is my kind of lullaby
I don't care about much,
but I care about you.
January 2010
14 posts
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-1-24) →
The Format (144)
Belle & Sebastian (90)
Ben Folds (28)
The Get Up Kids (25)
Ben Folds Five (16)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Belle & Sebastian - I’m a Cuckoo
...
“you bruised a drunk little girl’s heart”
I can't believe you.
I'm trying not to give a damn.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-1-10) →
Belle and Sebastian (29)
Modest Mouse (23)
Pixies (9)
Bon Iver (7)
Broken Social Scene (7)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Tomorrow night.
will be fucking legendary.
“A fucker as miserable as me could only be happy with someone as amazing as you.”
You are even more addicted to ruining shit than I...
But the problem is, is you ruin my shit.
Homeless again. So unhappy.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-1-3) →
The Format (43)
Modest Mouse (27)
M.I.A. (23)
Pixies (16)
Bon Iver (7)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
He talks about wanting to get the hell out of here. He talks about the other side of the country. He talks about his disdain for this city. He talks about not coming back in the fall.
It makes me really sad.
I'm tired. Let's lay down.
:)
December 2009
24 posts
Some words mean nothing.
These words mean everything.
I just blew off work.
And I’m feeling fucking great. Fuck you, job.
Yayyyy! It's New Years Eve!
We dress like trashy classy hookers and have our names on many guest lists. Yayaya!
My lips hurt,
I am wide awake.
I can’t wait for tomorrow.
Time to go buy something covered in sequins and glitter.
Breathe the fuck in. Breathe the fuck out.
Everything is fine.
Why can one day change everything?
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-12-27) →
Jason Anderson (39)
Pixies (28)
Modest Mouse (23)
Los Campesinos! (10)
Cocteau Twins (6)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
So I think...
that I want to go back to school in September. I just need to spend some time thinking about what it is I actually want to do.
Well I hope I don’t grow up to be as bitter as you. I gave you your Christmas presents and you put them off to the side and said you’ll get to them later. And now you mumble and ramble and sing in misery to yourself. Merry Christmas mom. Merry Christmas. The love feels great today.
I’m really just happy that after dinner with my grandmother I’m heading out to throw rocks...
See it don't matter man- Any night can be the best...
but only if your eyes are open and only if your heart is beating strong in your chest.
Christmas Eve's Eve- Got shitty,
really really shitty. Drank about 6 beers and smoked about six bongs before even going out last night. Drank more beer upon arrival. Did some drugs. Had something like four shots of cheap ass tequila shortly after that. Tequila AFTER beer. Fucking idiot. Could tell I was gonna be a mess. Hid in the bathroom. Had a vom party. Locked myself in there. Yelled at this boy who is ridiculously sweet and...
“God, if I have to die- you will have to die.”
Give me a call when you get your shit together.
Don't drive yourself fucking nuts man.
Be happy.
Happy.
Just really fucking happy.